7 SIGNS YOU HAVE FOUND THE ONE
If you enter into a serious relationship you want it to last. It can be scary putting your love out there unsure if you are going to end up heartbroken. How can anyone know if it is going to stand the test of time? There are seven signs that all point towards happily ever after. Let's see how your relationship holds up against these pillars.
Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship. Having the ability to communicate your feelings and emotions effectively, and having your partner listen and communicate in return tells you they are a keeper.
How you communicate is almost as important as what you are communicating. If your way of “communicating” includes yelling and throwing things, you need to begin working on your approach. It is great that you are speaking your mind, however, there is a healthy and unhealthy way to communicate with your partner.
One clear sign someone is NOT ready for a relationship are mind games. If either of you is playing the they-haven’t-texted-me-back-so-now-I’m-going-to-punish-them game or using a situation to manipulate them to respond back in a certain way, you are not off to a great start.
Relationships where someone is threatening to hurt themselves, or you, if you do not do something are bound for failure. If they somehow last, it sure is not going to be healthy.
If however, you have moved past the juvenile mental games you are on the path towards a long-lasting relationship.
Ever had really bad digestive issues and you are with your partner, or you simply need to poop? Being able to have these awkward conversations is critical. These conversations can put us in an uncomfortable situation (which allow you to bond even more). We all have awkward moments, we are human.
Society wants us to pretend that women, more specifically, don’t have any unflattering bodily functions. Let’s be real, that obviously isn’t true. This also applies to go makeup-less. If you are afraid to not wear makeup around your partner, it is time to have a conversation with yourself about if it is a personal choice or a fear they won’t accept you.
You should be free to be you, 100%, even if that may look a little messy somedays.
ALIGNMENT OF VALUES
Family, money, travel, religion, politics, kids etc. Where you stand on the importance of various hot topics are often deal-breakers for many couples. There are some values that may be important to you, but not a deal-breaker.
Knowing where each of your values lies on the continuum of importance is a necessary step before taking the next step in your relationship. Having most of these things in common, or an understanding of what that value means to you is a sign you are gonna last.
You do want someone with these similar values, but you also want to search for someone who will stretch you to be the best version of yourself. Sometimes this includes questioning values you have accepted for your entire life.
Be open to change, but make sure that those changes are your choice. Try to figure out your values before you dive into a long-term relationship. It is easy to “get lost” in the opinion of a partner simply because you love them and want the relationship to work. In the end, after it is over, only then do you realize how far you have diverted from your personal values.
This is tied to mind-games. Ultimately mind-games can tell you one thing, there are trust issues present. If you can communicate and work through the trust issues together that is wonderful and your relationship will grow stronger.
Trust is built and easily lost. There are many types of relationships now, but no matter what type of relationship you are in, boundaries need to be made. If those boundaries are crossed, there need to be firm consequences.
When you boil it down, most people are most afraid that their partner is going to cheat on them. If your partner is mature enough, if you both can communicate, then the likelihood of them cheating is much lower.
Trust one another, do not look for things that aren’t there because you are fearful. It can be terrifying, but if you are looking for them to fail, it can end up becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy,
All the responsibilities cannot be placed on one person. If specific gender roles work for you both, wonderful.
Expecting the other person to always make dinner, or always pay when you are out on a date are things that need to mutually be decided. Going out of your way to take over a task that your partner usually does is a loving gesture that should not go unnoticed. It also is one of the signs that show you have found the one.
There are few people in the world I can spend 24 hours a day with. My husband is one of them. Yes, he may drive me crazy some days, but I can’t get enough of him. You and your partner should want to spend tons of time together. If within five minutes of seeing one another you are fed up, it’s time to move on.
Want to fast track this test? Travel together to a place where you do not speak the language for a week.
If you come back from that holiday a stronger/ happier couple, you have found a keeper.